A review of Radical Acceptance: Embracing Your Life with the Heart of a Buddha By Tara Brach, Ph.D.

Accepting oneself completely is a far more challenging endeavor than we are sometimes led to believe. "Just let go of judgment", we are told, but it is a simplistic directive that is more easily said than done. In her book, Radical Acceptance, Tara Brach uses her own experience to demonstrate the depth of our inability to accept ourselves and also gives us practical suggestions about how to address, what she calls, "the trance of unworthiness". Brach, who is a therapist, Buddhist meditation teacher and Yogi intersperses stories about clients she has had with elements of Buddhist teachings. She uses the story of Siddhartha as an element of instructing us about the many different forms that temptation and opportunities for judgment can take in our lives. She compares the decision of Siddhartha to sit under the bodhi tree to the option we have to "pause" in life as a way of enhancing our awareness and bringing ourselves to a place of choice. After guiding us through how to bring full awareness to our experience of life and how to bring acceptance to each moment, Brach talks about "Saying Yes to Our Life". She says, "Our practice of saying yes is not limited to our immediate experience. We can say yes to the whole life we are living. Yes to our friendships, to our parenting, to our physical appearance, to our personality, to our work, to our spiritual path. However, because we are usually shooting for perfection, when we step back to take a look at "how we're doing," we often feel as if our life isn't turning out quite right."

Radical Acceptance goes beyond the concept of non-judgment to the concept of embracing ourselves and our lives. Throughout the book Brach offers guided meditation scripts and reflections to help the reader integrate the concepts into his or her own life. Some of the topics that are addressed in the meditations and reflections are The Practice of Vipasanna (mindfulness), The Sacred Pause, Facing Difficulty and Naming What is True, Developing an Embodied Presence, "Not Doing" When We Feel Driven by Wanting, Discovering Your Deepest Longing, Meeting Fear With an Open and Engaged Presence, Becoming the Holder of Suffering and Cultivating a Forgiving Heart. Each meditation or reflection offers the reader an opportunity to look into his or her own life with curiosity.

One of the most powerful chapters of the book is titled "Radical Acceptance of Desire". In this chapter Brach discusses the nature of desire and the concept that desire is the root of all suffering. What is particularly illuminating about Brach's discussion of desire is the idea that there is nothing wrong with desire itself. Brach advocates accepting that "wanting" exists in us and says that by rejecting desire in ourselves we are actually intensifying the wanting. It is difficult to do justice to the chapter in a short paragraph so suffice it to say that this chapter would be of benefit for anyone who "suffers" with an addiction or addictive wanting of any kind. Brach offers a perspective and methodology that, perhaps, offers a way through the shame and self-judgment and maybe even an ability to manage an addiction.

For anyone who struggles with not feeling good enough, with self-criticism and a pattern of seeking the approval of others, and especially for those of us who just aren't sure why we don't feel great all the time, Radical Acceptance is a somewhat challenging read but well worth the effort.

© 2006, Davis Virtual Assistance. This article may not be reprinted or copied on any type of media either in part or in whole.

Author:  Dina Crawford